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North Korea Launches Missile Strike: Nuclear Armageddon Begins!

April 12, 2012

In  a startling new Farnham Report Exclusive, we can reveal that North Korea has launched its controversial ballistic missile.

Just as the former leader, Kim Jong-il, flouted the Bush and early Obama administrations, the new leader, Kim Jung-un, has defied the US Administration and Japan by openly firing its controversial balllistic missile despite condemnation from the West.

North Korea insists that the missile is solely for the peaceful purpose of deploying a satellite into orbit, but the so-called “test” is widely regarded as a violation of United Nations Security Council resolutions demanding that North Korea refrain from firing rockets using ballistic missile technology.

BALLISTIC!

The United States and its allies denounced the launch as a “disguised ballistic missile test.”

MERCILESSLY PUNISH!

But Pyongyang says the rocket will transport a peaceful observation satellite into orbit, with the regime warning it will mercilessly punish any nation that interferes with the launch.

NORTH KOREA: “WE DON’T CARE!”

“We don’t really care about the opinions from the outside,” said Paek Chang-ho, the head of the satellite control centre at the Korean Committee of Space Technology.

“This is critical in order to develop our economy.

The rocket’s flight path will take it south past the Philippines and onwards to Brisbane, Australia (which wouldn’t be such a bad thing).

US WILL RESPOND WITH “STRONGLY WORDED STATEMENT”

Following the launch, the US and Japan announced that they will take “immediate action” in the United Nations Security Council whch will probably take the form of a “strongly worded statement.”

"Those bastards" said President Obama

White House spokesman Jay Carney said that “this kind of blatant disregard for their commitments makes it impossible” for the US to continue to provide North Korea with food aid.

“We will be responding strongly to this provocative act. And I mean a verbal response,” Mr Carney told reporters in Washington, seeming to dismiss any prospects for US military action.

 

 

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19 Comments leave one →
  1. April 12, 2012 10:46 am

    I KNEW I’d seen that North Korea space centre somewhere before…

  2. JAWS permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:11 am

    “We don’t really care about the opinions from the outside,” said Wayne Swan

    “This is critical in order to develop our economy.

  3. el gordo permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:12 am

    ‘Also invited on the trip were foreign space experts. They said the mission-control equipment appeared dated compared with what is used in the West or Russia. Paek said the computer hardware and software were developed in the DPRK.

    ‘James Oberg, an NBC News space consultant and one of the world’s leading interpreters of space exploration, said, “I believe this is not a military shot”.

    Yep…storm in a teacup.

  4. JAWS permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:12 am

    Thunderbirds are go………….!

  5. JAWS permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:13 am

    “We will be responding strongly to this provocative act. And I mean a verbal response,”

    – Craig Thompson

  6. JAWS permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:13 am

    “this kind of blatant disregard for their commitments makes it impossible”

    Andrew Wilkie

  7. April 12, 2012 11:20 am

    Very funny Jaws! 🙂

  8. April 12, 2012 11:25 am

    “We really don’t care what the outside world thinks”

    ~ Julia Gillard

  9. JAWS permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:30 am

    LOL @ reb

    Politicians around the world just have the same reaction to a nuclear bomb as they would to a fart in a lift

  10. TB Queensland permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:45 am

    I just saw it fly over Brisbane! The pilot waved too! She seemed noice … I think she winked too … but its hard to tell with North Koreans … 😀

  11. JAWS permalink
    April 12, 2012 11:52 am

    Mmmmmmmmm

    Is Penny Wong the pilot ?

  12. April 12, 2012 11:57 am

    Apparently it’s carrying a 100 kilogram payload…

    Amanda Vandstone.

  13. April 12, 2012 12:03 pm

    Just wait until North Korea cops a load of the strongly worded statement from the United Nations…

    Then they’ll really be shitting themselves…

    *sarcasm alert…

  14. TB Queensland permalink
    April 12, 2012 4:24 pm

    What’s a strongly worded statement anyway?

    … does it include special words … perhaps they use that famous phrase … “bunch of Fuckwits™” … ? 😯

  15. Tony permalink
    April 12, 2012 7:49 pm

    Any excuse to play this again. 😉

  16. el gordo permalink
    April 13, 2012 7:23 am

    The rocket will avoid Brissy and pass over central Oz.

    http://video.theaustralian.com.au/2222058819/Mystery-North-Korean-rocket-headed-our-way

  17. TB Queensland permalink
    April 13, 2012 12:13 pm

    G’day All … I’ve just come into some beautiful khaki silk cloth (about parachute size) … if anyone is interested in buying all or a few square metres just let, sreb, know your address and quantity required … I can then work out shipping and costs and give you a quote …

    BTW it has been used but only once …

    Can anyone tell me what this means … I have a visitor who just dropped in and keeps writing it on my table cloth …

    나는 망명 탐구자이다

  18. JAWS permalink
    April 13, 2012 10:34 pm

    So the rocket splashed down just off south korea.

    I wonder where James Cameron’s deep sea sub is right now ?

    Nah……….I can’t allow my head to be getting into that shit…..

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