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Budget Night Bingo with Wayne Swan!

May 8, 2012

The excitement is building as the Australia patiently awaits the delivery of the 2012-13 Federal Budget from the World’s Greatest Treasurer; “The Swanmeister”.

Final preparations are already underway with advisers and style assistants carefully selecting the most suitable tie for Mr Swan, with the Farnham Report correspondents tipping that Mr Swan will opt for a salmon pink number.

The Prime Minister, also expected to be present in the chamber for this great event, is also being coached in the gentle art of saying “hear hear” rather than “oi oi.”

Sportsbet has odds suggesting that Julia will opt for a silk neck scarf to soften the sullen “Gina Hard Faced Bitch” demeanour she has adopted more recently.

So join us live tonight for Budget Night Bingo, a responsible drinking game live broadcast direct from the Farnham Report’s very own Dealer Drome Paint Ball Mini-Sports Ampi-theatre Velodrome Emporium Exhibition Centre.

Hosted by the ABC’s very own Karmichael Hunt Chris Uhlmann live on ABC 1 from 7.30pm and on ABC News 24.

It’s so exciting!

For those who want to get in amongst the thick of it all, Melbourne’s “WonkDrinks” crew will be gathering at Melbourne’s Victoria Hotel in the cbd to witness the entire spectacle live as it unfolds!!

 

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35 Comments leave one →
  1. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 1:19 pm

    I expect we will hear “Sharing the Mining Wealth”

  2. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 1:19 pm

    “This is a Labor Budget”

  3. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 1:20 pm

    “We’ve taken the hard decisions”

  4. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 1:21 pm

    “……………An economy that is the envy of the developed world”

  5. el gordo permalink
    May 8, 2012 1:42 pm

    This is their last throw of the dice and they are hoping for a bounce in the polls, which is unlikely considering most of us have already made up our minds.

  6. May 8, 2012 2:05 pm

    “We’ve taken the hard decisions”

    LOL…. 🙂

    Translation: “We’ve taken the politically expedient decisons…”

  7. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 3:43 pm

    The real test of this Budget will be buried deep within the appendix pages. It will immediately confirm whether Swan actually believes his own figures or if he thinks they are just more f**king lies.

    The test will be whether there is any Budget request to increase the capacity for the Commonwealth Govt to borrow which has been the hallmark of almost every ALP budget delivered since 2007.

    Currently the Commonwealth Govt limit sits at $250B.

    If he moves it a single dollar then we have confirmation that Gillard and Swan are just continuing on with Fiscal Bullshit

  8. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 4:02 pm

    And of course the NBN will be classified as an “Investment” in the Budget Papers not as “Debt”.

    As will the $10B “Green Scheme” which does not contain a single project that can garner bank external private venture funding.

    We can kiss that $10B goodbye……….!

  9. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 5:37 pm

    Budget Lock Up has sprung a Leak

    Suggestions of large cash handouts not previously leaked according to Skynews

  10. TB Queensland permalink
    May 8, 2012 5:46 pm

    Could someone please explain this to me?

    PRIME Minister Julia Gillard won’t rule out that the government will be forced to lift the Commonwealth’s $250 billion debt ceiling to deliver Labor’s promised Budget surplus.

    So, you borrow more to have a surplus? Of borrowed money … that you don’t “own” …

    … glad we don’t run our household like that …

  11. TB Queensland permalink
    May 8, 2012 5:47 pm

    Ooops just read your comment, Wally … guess what? 😆

  12. Neil of Sydney permalink
    May 8, 2012 6:36 pm

    I do not know how the ALP gets away with things like this.

    http://www.theaustralian.com.au/national-affairs/treasury/gillard-government-plans-to-link-106bn-mining-tax-to-fund-disability-scheme/story-fndbwnla-1226350056038

    THE Gillard government is restructuring the revenues of the controversial mining tax to provide more social benefits from the mining boom.”

    The ALP maintained that Costello wasted the boom from 2004-2007 because he allegedly spent most of the extra money or handed back as tax cuts. Costello actually saved most of the boom so Labor was telling lies again.

    So what does Labor propose to do with the extra mining tax revenue??

    Spend the money or hand it back as tax cuts.

    Unbelievable

  13. May 8, 2012 6:56 pm

    Still got a hardon for Peter the Secreter then , Neil? 🙄

  14. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    May 8, 2012 7:00 pm

    “This is a Labor budget”
    “We’ll reap the benefits of the tough decisions”
    “unlike those opposite…”

  15. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    May 8, 2012 7:06 pm

    Even though I’d love to play the drinking game, I’m off for a meal and a nice red. I’d have to scoff the red in blissful ignorance of Swan’s clichés.

  16. May 8, 2012 7:33 pm

    The opposition rabble are off to a unseemly start…

  17. May 8, 2012 7:35 pm

    Stop mentioning the Opposition because shutup!

  18. May 8, 2012 7:37 pm

    Julia’s gone for the pearl necklace rather than the soft scarf look…..

    *disappointed*

  19. May 8, 2012 7:38 pm

    If anyone ever had trouble sleeping, all they need to do is listen to a speech by Wayne “Yawn” Swan…

  20. May 8, 2012 7:39 pm

    oi oi…!!

  21. May 8, 2012 7:40 pm

    working families *sip*

  22. May 8, 2012 7:49 pm

    I’m not watching…any chance of fantastic new obbordunidys?

  23. James of North Melbourne permalink
    May 8, 2012 8:01 pm

    Pearl necklace???

    😯

  24. May 8, 2012 8:03 pm

    Where’s fkn Jaws…? Asks for a party then doesn’t show up. The cnut!

  25. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    May 8, 2012 8:26 pm

    I managed to listen to about 10 minutes of Wayne on my way to the local cafe. He said ‘working families’ a couple of times, and gave himself a big slap on the back for being an outstanding treasurer!

    I haven’t regurgitated my pasta, which has taken some self control.

  26. Neil of Sydney permalink
    May 8, 2012 8:35 pm

    The deficit for this year is now estimated at $44B.

    Thats a relief. I thought it was going to be higher

  27. James of North Melbourne permalink
    May 8, 2012 9:23 pm

    So what did I miss?

  28. TB Queensland permalink
    May 8, 2012 9:32 pm

    So what did I miss?

    Nowt .. as per … 😉

  29. Neil of Sydney permalink
    May 8, 2012 9:36 pm

    Not too sure what to make of this

    http://www.news.com.au/breaking-news/outrage-over-labor-budget-leaks/story-e6frfku0-1226350251851

    “THE Gillard Federal Government leaked key parts of the 2012/13 budget ahead of the official 7.30pm release, in a bid to keep the issue at the top of the news cycle after a messy day in parliament.”

  30. el gordo permalink
    May 8, 2012 10:11 pm

    Harry Jenkins is perfect for the job of speaker, can’t understand why Labor rejected one of their own. 😉

    Federal politics has become a standing joke.

  31. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 10:39 pm

    Oooops

    Sorry I’m late . One of my clients died on the weekend and I only just found out and I have certain joint powers that needed exercising.

    Anyway just trying to catch up with the vote buying.

    Why don’t these people start to stand for something. We could have the Gillard DualCarriageWay on every motorway, the Swan High School everywhere, the Wong Hospital Wing.

    But no

    We get handouts handouts and handouts.

    For a already announced over compensated carbon tax what’s this then ?

    How bad will it be ?

  32. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 10:44 pm

    Oh and don’t bother feeling sorry about the dead client

    I offered my condolences to the 40 ish wife and she stopped me and said

    “stop ………you and I know what a true cockhead he was……..since his mums dead I guess no one will really miss him”

    What could I possibly add to that I thought

  33. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 10:49 pm

    Oh

    Then she thanked me for coming over at late notice and gave me a bottle of his cellared “Hill of Grace”

    So I lost a client and gained a new one who now needs some hourly guidance on running the business her husband used to run

  34. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 11:10 pm

    I wish I got paid on the basis of how good my budget forecasts were?

    I would have had a lift from the garage to the lounge area years ago.

    Friggin’ poverty

  35. JAWS permalink
    May 8, 2012 11:37 pm

    By the way ToM

    Don’t get too excited its only a 2001 vintage

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